The (Long and Winding) Road to Wembley

Sutton Common Rovers FC v Steyning Town Community FC (Wednesday 25th August 2021) Last weekend I had the pleasure of seeing Halesowen Town and Sutton Coldfield Town in the preliminary round. Tonight it was Sutton Common Rovers "at home" to Steyning Town Community in a preliminary round replay. I promise I'm not a Sutton-obsessive, after all there are others. Sutton Athletic in Kent, Bishop Sutton near Bristol, and obviously new members of The Football League, Sutton United. If you're reading this, Chris Sutton, don't worry...you're safe. I say "at home" because I was expecting to be paying a visit to Gander Green Lane, the home of Sutton United, where The Commoners ground-share. However, after some wet weather causing delays in pitch upgrades Sutton United have had to postpone the start of their home campaign in League Two. So it was off to Merland Rise, the home of Banstead Athletic FC, for me and 83 other hardy souls to witness this gateway to the

Halesowen Town FC v Sutton Coldfield Town FC (Saturday 21st August 2021) Nicknames. Some are obvious (Reds, Clarets, Magpies, Canaries, Swans). My team, Birmingham City, is obvious - The Blues - due to the understandably downbeat mood of most fans most times. Others are less directly obvious (Hatters, Cobblers, Foxes, Blades) but there's a decent link. Then there are those that need a bit more thought (Toffees, Trotters, Addicks, Monkey Hangers). Sutton Coldfield Town. The Royals (The Royal Town of Sutton Coldfield). My Auntie Elsie used to run The Dog Inn on The Parade in Sutton Coldfield. Family Royalty. Halesowen Town. The Yeltz. My instinct was something to do with yellow, but there are more interesting possibilities. Ben Bullock and Matt Ponter in their book, The Yeltzmen (and in today’s programme notes), try to get to the bottom of the story.  Is it a corruption of an old version of the name Halesowen (formerly Hales, before that Halas)? Halas locally may have been pronounced

Larkhall Athletic FC v Lymington Town FC (Saturday 7th August 2021) There aren't as many sloping pitches as there used to be. One of my rare 11-a-side appearances was on a fiercely sloping pitch at Sheffield Hallam Uni (Sheffield Poly back then) for a crack outfit from the Stats department. Daffern, Waite, Gascoigne, Johnson, Blogg, Kendall, Sime, LeVoi, French, Hillman and Simon's Mate are names that were destined for greatness until the match began. After taking an early lead we lost 2-1 and I was dropped (correct decision by the team manager, me). That's sloping pitches for you. Oxford United, Barnet, several others but perhaps most famously Yeovil were furnished with The Sloping Pitch back in the day. Add to that list Larkhall Athletic FC and their home at Plain Ham on the outskirts of Bath. Programme notes advise that after the land being used as allotments during World War II, The Larks moved back to the ground in 1951. After another 24 years of sloping around, the gr